If you change the way you listen to others, you can connect and understand them with greater richness and depth. It is a mutual benefit! Just try it.
When I listen with the heart
I stop playing the game of non-listening.
In other words
I step inside the other’s skin;
I walk in his shoes;
I attempt to see things from his point-of-view;
I establish eye contact;
I give him conscious attention;
I reject my understanding of his words; I question;
I attempt to clarify;
I draw the other out
as his lips stumble over words,
as his face becomes flushed,
as he turns his face aside.
I make the other feel that
I understand that he is important,
that I am grateful that he trusts me enough
to share deep, personal feelings with me.
I grant him worth.
A poem of Louis Girzaitis, 1972
Please remember: People shine in the light of your attention for them.